Three Truths That Will Improve Your Life
Every couple of months, I tend to look back and review everything I’ve done, both major and minor, across all the facets of my life. It’s incredible at how much we can accomplish within a few months. It’s even more incredible at how much we grow and transform within that same timeframe. I’m a fuller expression of myself than I was several months ago.
I’ve learned new theories that have changed how I interact with others. I’ve dealt with issues in various relationships, which challenged my emotional maturity. I’ve invested time in myself, in order to become more aligned with my values and beliefs.
I’ve experienced quite a bit so far. Many individuals, knowingly and unknowingly, contributed to my personal growth. So, in the spirit of reciprocation, here are three truths that I believe will improve your life.
1 Be Vulnerable
I’d like to thank Brene Brown (one of my virtual mentors, not a relative), for showing me how important it is to be vulnerable. A few years ago, I was in a negative emotional space with a close friend who was undergoing an extremely difficult time, and long story short, I imploded which become one of the many reasons for the end of our friendship.
Had I not been so frightened to reveal my vulnerable side with my friend, the situation would’ve definitely evolved into a different outcome. Or so I wish to be believe but as the saying goes, hindsight is 20/20.
Key takeaway here: Don’t be frightened to be vulnerable. When you feel as though you have nowhere else to turn, talk to a loved one. Trust that they will accept your flaws, connect with your fears and help you discover a strength you never knew you had.
2 Act From Acceptance, Enjoyment or Enthusiasm
There are only 24 hours in a day and we sleep for almost one-third of that, so that only leaves us with 16 hours each day to live, work and play. That means you can’t do it all. That means you have to prioritize what you deem valuable. That means sometimes you’ll have to say no.
At least that’s how I thought about it, until I read Eckhart Tolle’s book called “A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose”. Eckhart elegantly states that we should strive to operate from three modalities: acceptance, enjoyment and enthusiasm. Here’s my take on this:
Some activities we have to do, like filing our taxes or changing a flat tire. In these instances, we should operate from a state of acceptance. No matter how we feel about the task, it needs to get done so that we can continue on with our lives. Some activities we like to do, such as going on coffee dates with our best friends and watching our favourite shows. In these instances, we will operate from a state of enjoyment. Doing what we like to do will naturally put us in a great mood! Other activities we thoroughly look forward to doing, like accepting a reward for our performance at work or getting married to our beloved significant other. In these instances, naturally we operate from a state of enthusiasm and excitement. After all, in these moments, everything is beautiful.
With all this in mind, decide how you’ll be spending your time from now on. Before you make your next move, ask yourself this question: Am I working from a state of acceptance, enjoyment or enthusiasm? And if none of these apply, don’t waste your precious time.
3 Celebrate All Your Victories
As I grow older, I'm beginning to realize that there's no finish line to adulthood as I once believed. There's no defining moment where you're handed a trophy and congratulated for becoming a full-fledged adult, capable of functioning within the world. Life will simply continue to challenge you in different ways as you grow older.
That’s why it’s important to take time to celebrate your victories, no matter how small they may be. It’s easy to be enthused about our big victories, like getting a promotion, buying our first home or successfully running a business, but we mustn’t ignore our daily wins!
Did you finally go to that spin class you’ve been putting off? Read that book that’s been on your desk for months? Or repaint that coffee table in your living room? Wonderful! Reward yourself with a bath, a glass of your favourite wine or an errand-less day. These may be small victories, but they’re victories, nonetheless!
Aim to celebrate your victories, no matter how small, and encourage your loved ones to do the same. For life is a compilation of many, ordinary moments with a dash of extraordinary ones sprinkled in between them. Finding joy during the less glorious moments, will increase our overall happiness.
No matter how minor our experiences may seem, they have the power to shape who we are becoming.
Look back at the last several months of your life. What lessons have you learned? How are you different than you were before? What or who has influenced you recently?